Rejecting those downer rejections

A funny ditty reported to Brian Doyle of The Kenyon Review (link compliments of Andrew Sullivan's blog at The Atlantic):

One of the very best: a rejection note sent by the writer Stefan Merken to an editor who had rejected one of his short stories. 'Please forgive me for not accepting your rejection letter,' wrote Merken. 'At this time I cannot accept a rejection of my short story. I accept more than 99 percent of the rejections I receive. Many I don’t agree with, but I realize that accepting a piece of fiction for publication is a very subjective judgment call. My acceptance of your rejection letter is also a subjective process and therefore I am returning your letter to you. I did read your letter. I read every letter I receive. Your letter was well-written, but due to time constraints from my own writing schedule, I am unable to make editorial comments. I do make mistakes. Don’t you, as an editor, be disheartened by this role reversal. The road of publishing is long and tedious. You need successful publications and I need for successful publications to print my stories. I will expect to see my story in your next publication. Good luck in the future.'

Read the rest here.